Linda Tjossem speaks with reverence of her undergraduate days at William & Mary. It’s where she received a world-class education, tackling Western European studies, grew in ways she never imagined, had the normal college experiences and made lifelong friends.
“There is no doubt, W&M has produced some accomplished and celebrated individuals,” the 1980 William & Mary graduate said. “But the deep friendships formed in college can also have big impact in lives.”
One of those friendships, formed her sophomore year, is what Linda cherishes most from her undergraduate days in Williamsburg.
“She’s my best friend,” Linda said of Laurie (Middleton) Hardaway. “I don’t know where I would be without her.”
The two couldn’t be more different.
Linda, who is from southeastern Virginia, met Laurie in fall 1977. Laurie, who grew up in Louisville, Kentucky, was majoring in English. During the ensuing 40-plus years, they may have been separated by miles but little else.
They were there, often side-by-side, for each other through the normal ups and downs of life: marriages (including one at the Wren Chapel), divorces, professional accomplishments, retirements, the joys and angst of raising teenage daughters and everything in between.
After Linda was involved in a horrific bicycling accident in 2011, it was Laurie who played a vital role in her recovery and rehab, unknowingly bringing her back to the activity she loved.
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Linda and her bike
Growing up, Linda rode her bike to explore her hometown of Saluda, a small community about an hour east of Williamsburg. She still has that bike, a brown 10-speed Schwinn Continental with shifters on the handlebars. She bought it at Agee’s Bicycles in Richmond in the early 1970s.
“I would say I’ve been riding forever,” Linda said. “It was just fun, but it started as a way to get places.”
When Linda went off to college, that bike went with her.
Her favorite trips, about 20 miles, were along the Colonial Parkway to Jamestown Island. She especially enjoyed playing tour guide to her W&M classmates, although Laurie didn’t participate. As Linda moved from state to state as an adult, she continued riding. It was, at various times, for fun, exercise, camaraderie and a way to clear her mind.
“It’s just been my thing,” she said.
Eventually, she got hooked on long rides, some multiday events of up to 200 miles. In 2011, shortly after returning to Virginia following a long career as an air traffic controller in New York, Maine, New Hampshire and Illinois, Linda signed up for a charity ride on the Eastern Shore.
About an hour into the first day of the two-day ride, near the 17-mile mark, she crashed while riding close to 20 mph, with the bike breaking in three places.
Linda suffered, among other things, a traumatic brain injury. Her immediate recovery came down to three people, whom she calls her angels: Ann Marie Campolattaro, a York County family physician who eventually became Linda’s doctor; William Diggs, a lieutenant with the Newport News Fire Department; and Dr. David Waters. Campolattaro and Diggs were behind her on the ride, came across the crash site and began life-saving actions. Waters was the doctor on call at Norfolk General Hospital, where Linda was flown by a Nightingale helicopter. He scheduled emergency surgery, knowing without it, Linda could die.
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Long road to recovery
If Campolattaro, Diggs and Waters receive the credit for saving Linda’s life, Laurie deserves much of the credit for Linda’s recovery.
Laurie, who went to law school in Chicago after graduating from William & Mary, had moved back to Hampton Roads to practice law in the mid-1980s. She has lived in Gloucester since 1986, and now was about 20 minutes from Linda. She was at the hospital the day after the crash, when Linda came out of the first of many surgeries.
“Honestly, I was a little shaken by her appearance,” Laurie said. “She had half her head shaved, and I think a little gauze cap on. Her face was bruised and stitched up. The nurse had a Ziploc bag of her blond hair that they had saved.”
Linda eventually spent three weeks in two hospitals. When she got home to Gloucester, she couldn’t drive, couldn’t shower alone. Somebody had to be in the house with her at all times.
“It was like having a big baby,” Linda said, adding it was eight or nine months before she was “right” again.
Because she had a brain injury, Linda’s driver’s license was suspended.
“Being an independent adult and then you can’t drive, that’s a really big deal,” said her daughter, Rachel Abbott, who was in high school at the time of the crash. “It’s not like she had anywhere to go, but it’s still a lot. She felt trapped.”
Laurie said the first few weeks at home were tough on Linda.
“She does not like to sit idle, and she particularly never likes to ask for help,” Laurie said. “That was all hard for her.”
Still, Laurie never doubted her friend would recover, thanks in part to immediate help and great doctors.
Laurie rarely left her side, driving Linda to doctor’s appointments, physical therapy, occupational therapy and speech therapy sessions, and countless other places.
Laurie’s twin daughters were in college at the time, her son was in high school and she was a devoted wife. But Linda became a priority. “She didn’t have time, but she made time,” Linda said.
To make things worse, Linda’s second marriage was falling apart. She needed help. Again, it was Laurie who was there.
“She just sort of saw my house go nuts,” Linda said. “She stepped in and was kind of a mother to my daughter.”
It was about two years before Linda started riding again. A friend coaxed her to take short trips close to home.
“I got back on the bike, and I still loved it,” she said.
Those turned into weekly rides, and when other friends heard, they offered to join her. She doesn’t do any big charity rides anymore but does multiday excursions in addition to 20-25 mile rides a few times a week.
Of course, that made Laurie nervous.
“I didn’t try to talk her out of it because I knew that would do no good,” Laurie said.
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W&M reunions
Colleges often bring together people of different backgrounds and personalities. Laurie calls herself a country girl; Linda is more big city. Linda is outgoing; Laurie is spontaneous.
“We’re so different. We’re two extremes,” Linda said. “But there’s a bond there.”
Linda and Laurie roomed together senior year in the Prince George House. They shared a few classes, were in the same social circles and had typical college adventures.
Homecoming is a time Linda looks forward to each fall, reconnecting with other William & Mary friends, as well. However, neither she nor Laurie will be there this year as Linda’s daughter is getting married in Raleigh, North Carolina. Of course, Laurie and her family will be at the wedding.
Linda will miss that annual gathering of classmates, even though she knows how it will go.
“You’re getting together and telling the same old story,” Linda said. “And laughing just as hard.”
She has three or four groups of college friends, but they don’t always intersect even though they know of each other. One enjoys wining and dining, another likes picnics, and another hiking.
“I have all these groups … and we go have fun,” Linda said. “I’m grateful for them.”
It’s nothing like her bond with Laurie. They had no way of knowing at the time that those college years would provide friendships and form bonds they wanted to maintain. Many of Linda’s friends who did not go to W&M enjoyed their college experiences, but not to the same extent. It’s something her first husband, Bob Tobin, noticed, and something he wanted his sons to experience.
“He highly recommended William & Mary to his sons because he watched me and my friends, and he’s like, ‘You guys really had a solid bond,’” Linda said.
Tobin’s oldest son, Connor, attended W&M and met his future wife there while in graduate school. The older Tobin said his son’s friend groups primarily are W&M graduates also.
“The thing that’s amazing in a way is it’s like the next generation of what I think Linda experienced,” Bob Tobin said. “They’re very close with those folks, again, a lot like Linda was with her peers.”
Linda said: “William & Mary does produce those bonds unlike any other school.”
She and Laurie, whose son also attended W&M, know that firsthand, and have been living it for more than 40 years.
Bob Flynn, bobf6381@cox.net
